C. Jake Williams...
Is hopelessly addicted to Mountain Dew. (Thanks Brittany for reminding me)
Is adamant in his belief that the Jazz should trade Mermot Okur.
Thinks The Fountain is the most romantic movie ever.
Has an awesome credit score.
Has weak ankles.
Once got an ear infection from snorting hot sauce.
Notes the similarities between the feelings of cold and wet.
Scored a 5 on AP Calculus test.
Left leg is about an inch shorter than the right.
Graduated from West Jordan High School in 2003.
Prefers salad to steak.
Laughs every time Sweeney Todd slits a throat.
Believes luck is probability taken personally.
Thinks in Venn diagrams.
Has a blood gene mutation.
Didn't expect his parents to stay married, but is grateful that they did.
Can block out the sun with each nostril.
Thinks Andrei Kirilenko would be perfect for the Golden State Warriors.
Finished reading Starship Troopers. Thanks Melissa!
Collected basketball cards as a kid.
Knows more about Tupac than any black man should.
Never contradicts himself.
Likes broccoli.
Graduated from Utah State University in 2008.
Loves Chili's salsa.
Has to look at his keys before locking a door.
Owns a 2006 Dodge Stratus.
Likes Lucky#Slevin more than any other movie.
Played basketball with Shane almost every day growing up.
Is definitely an introvert.
Sometimes contradicts himself.
Hates spinach.
Is in the worst shape of his life.
Majored in physics for three years.
Didn't need a cosigner for his car.
Does not want children right now, maybe not ever.
Has had five mini-strokes since high school.
Never threw a punch between 1st grade and Summer 2008.
Is often compared to Quagmire.
Wishes he was often compared to Stewie.
Or Brian.
But not Meg.
Definitely not Meg.
Thinks Aldous Huxley was right.
Won Sterling Scholar for Mathematics in 2003.
Is atheist.
Doesn't know if he'll ever finish Only Revolutions.
Is Jerry Maguire.
Will never watch The Notebook again.
Is a big deal.
Was shocked when he won the Class Einstein poll award during his senior year in high school.
Operated his neighbor's cornstand at age 13.
Misses Brittany Woiderski.
Thinks Chuck Palahniuk did mescaline with Aldous Huxley.
Looked into a vasectomy but decided against it.
Helped start the Society of Physics Students at USU in 2006.
Thinks he and his siblings are paralleled by the Corleone brothers.
Never thought Brett Favre was THAT good.
Wishes his relationship with dad started sooner than age 19.
Sleep-walks, talks, showers, checks email and everything else you can do with a woman.
Still has nightmares.
Wants to try mescaline, with or without Palahniuk or Huxley.
Preferably with.
Loves pineapple.
Strongly believes in evolution.
Won the USU physics department undergraduate award in 2005 and 2006.
Gets most of his new music from movie soundtracks.
Has no clue what his editors at the Deseret News want from him.
Wants Austin to play basketball in high school.
Thinks Clint plays basketball like Joakim Noah.
Doesn't like the taste of beer or coffee.
I'm serious, I don't like it.
They all taste the same.
Stop offering me beer and coffee.
Values logic over emotions.
Was a member of the FFA in 2003.
Could be a better uncle.
Is a Utilitarian.
You were there.