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By C. Jake Williams. March 27, 2008
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I walk like my mother.
I'm sure You've walked next to people like me before. Not for long, mind You, but I'm positive You've had a go-getter like me pass You in a way that begs the question "Where's he going in such a hurry?"
Nowhere important, usually, but always in a hurry, seemingly.
I think it has something to do with how I'm built. And how my mother is built. How a hummingbird is built, for that matter.
We've all heard that the smaller an animal is, the faster its heart beats. An elephant heart sludges along like cold maple syrup while a robin's life pump drums like a jackhammer.
Why You walk like waffle topping is beyond me. Why I tear up the sidewalk is beyond You.
The possible correlation between animal size and walking pace occurred to me this morning as I passed a larger mammal on campus. While I would describe my own walking style as graceful or brisk, this beast's style was a struggle, a deliberate trudge.
I know I'm not in good physical shape like I used to be, but today I realized that my speedwalking is only adding to the problem. How can I gain weight if I'm constantly psuedo-running it off? The other mammal has the opposite problem.
The silver lining is that my mother will likely look the way she looks today for a very long time.
You were there.